


Perfecter

by DoctorV



Series: Archive: Doc's Old-Ass Fake News Fic (Daily Show, Colbert Report, etc.) [21]
Category: Fake News FPF, The Colbert Report, The Daily Show
Genre: Alternate Universe - Animals, Anthropomorphic, Gen, Groping, M/M, Rabbits, Ridiculous, Tails
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-04-01 03:34:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13989612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorV/pseuds/DoctorV
Summary: Jon Stewbit and Stephen Colbunny at the Rolling Stone photoshoot.





	Perfecter

**Author's Note:**

> Archiving some old old OLD fanfic of mine. This was originally posted to LiveJournal 04/25/2009, with the author's note:  
> "This was written to go with [this pic](https://reellifer.deviantart.com/art/Stewbit-and-Colbunny-121488448)...in which they are anthropomorphic bunnies.  
> A friend linked me to [a pic that has since disappeared], and over the course of the discussion it was decided that Jon would be grey and Stephen would have a floppy ear that doesn't unflop. (In-character, he tries to keep the other ear flopped and claims he's a lop-ear, but you can tell he's headed for a character break when his other ear starts twitching up. The fans, of course, keep track of such things.)

"Squish in just a little more...little m—perfect!"

 

"'Squish'?" Jon repeated under his breath. "Is that the technical term?"

 

Stephen poked his back, mouth twitching. "Behave."

 

"Funny man, I'm not the one who scared a gofer by demanding a bowl of red M&Ms _in character_."

 

Snickering, Stephen glanced at him. "I still can't believe he actually _got_ them."

 

"Iiin a little more...."

 

"I thought it was perfect," Jon muttered to Stephen.

 

Stephen's right hand settled on the small of Jon's back. "And now it's perfecter."

 

"That's not a word."

 

"Jon, it's a word if I _say_ it's a word," replied the character, turning just enough to raise an eyebrow at him. "I won't let any wordin _istas_ force me to conform to the fascism of Miriam Webster!"

 

Jon covered his mouth with one hand to try to cover a giggle, ears twitching. "And you wonder why you got the M&Ms."

 

"Mr. Colbert, could you just turn this way...?"

 

Head whipping around, Stephen flashed his biggest, cheesiest grin at the photographer, his left hand rising in front of him in a thumbs-up. His left ear was sticking up, out of character, while his right remained motionlessly flopped behind his head as always.

 

His _right_ hand slid down to the ball of fluff that was Jon's tail and started petting it. Jon forced himself to stay very, very still, though he couldn't help the uncomfortable expression on his face. He couldn't _help_ that he had a fluffy tail, usually his jacket hid it. But Stephen had been fascinated ever since had found out about the "mini-Jewfro on your _butt_!"

 

"Perfect! That's perfect! Hold that, we're going to get a few more!"

 

"Stroking my _ass_ doesn't make you look any straighter, you know," Jon grumbled quietly.

  
"It's your own damn fault for having having such a _fluffy_ ass."


End file.
